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Say a funny joke

Posted: Fri May 04, 2007 4:46 pm
by Eduardo
Things are too serious lately.  Let's hear a good joke.I will start.A cowboy walks in to a video poker bar and says I want a drink what do you have?Bartender says  24689. Cowboy yells "draw!"

Re: Say a funny joke

Posted: Fri May 04, 2007 6:00 pm
by babybubba
....and Shadowman counters: "24689 can't be right because no one ran it by me yet"!

Re: Say a funny joke

Posted: Fri May 04, 2007 6:17 pm
by Eduardo

Re: Say a funny joke

Posted: Fri May 04, 2007 7:22 pm
by chuck arl
I hope his hold buttons were verrry sticky !!!---cwa---

Re: Say a funny joke

Posted: Fri May 04, 2007 7:27 pm
by Eduardo
I do not even know what that means.

Re: Say a funny joke

Posted: Sun May 06, 2007 1:51 pm
by Eduardo
More jokes?

Re: Say a funny joke

Posted: Wed May 09, 2007 8:43 am
by MikeA






Dolly Parton


and Queen Elizabeth
die on the same day and they both go before an Angel to find out if they'll be admitted to Heaven.


Unfortunately, there's only one space left that day, so the Angel must decide which of them gets in.  The Angel asks Dolly if there's some particular reason why she should go to Heaven.

Dolly takes off her top and says,
"Look at these, they're the most perfect breasts God ever created, and I'm sure
it will please the angels to be able to see them every day, for eternity."

The Angel thanks Dolly, and asks Her Majesty the same question.  

The Queen takes a bottle of Perrier
out of her purse,
shakes it up, and gargles. Then, she spits into a toilet and pulls the lever.

The  Angel says, "OK, your Majesty,
you may go  in."

Dolly is outraged and asks, "What was that all about?  I show you two of God's own perfect creations and you turn me down. She spits into a commode and she gets in! Would you explain that to me?"

"Sorry, Dolly," says the Angel,
"but even in Heaven,
a  royal flush
beats a pair - no matter how big they are!"





 

Re: Say a funny joke

Posted: Wed May 09, 2007 1:28 pm
by Eduardo
Very good MikeA! Who else? Does not have to be about poker either.

Re: Say a funny joke

Posted: Wed May 09, 2007 10:20 pm
by Webman
A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender notices he has a peg leg, a hook for a hand, and an eye patch.
"How'd you lose your leg," asked the bartender.
 
"Arrrr.... I was swept overboard in a great storm and just as they pulled me aboard, a great shark came up and tore me leg right off!"
 
"How horrifying!" Replied the bartender. "Mind if I ask about your hook?"

"Arrrr... we boarded a ship and one of the fellers sliced my hand right off just as I was sticking his captain in the chest. I won that one, that day."
 
"And your eye... what happened there?"

"Arrrr... A seagull dropping hit me right in me face!"
 
"You lost your eye to a seagull dropping?"
 
"Well, it was me first day with the hook."
 
 

Re: Say a funny joke

Posted: Thu May 10, 2007 3:51 pm
by faygo
My Private Part Died
 
An old man, Mr Goldstein, was living the last days of his life in a nursing home.
One day he appeard to be very sad and depressed.
Nurse Tracy asked him if anything was wrong.
"Yes, Nurse Tracy," said Mr. Goldstein," My Private Part died today, and I am very sad.
Knowing her patients were sometimes forgetful and sometimes a little crazy she replied,"Oh, Im so sorry , Mr Goldstein, please accept my condolences."
The following day, Mr Goldstein was walking down the hall with his Private Part hanging out of his pajamas, when he met Nurse Tracy.
"Mr. Goldstein," she said  you shouldn't be walking down the hall like that. "Please put your Private Part back inside your pajamas."
But, Nurse Tracy,"replied Mr. Goldstein,"I told you yesterday that My Private Part died.
"Yes, you did tell me that, but why is it hanging out of your pajamas?
 
Well, he replied, "Today's the viewing.