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Things are too serious lately. Let's hear a good joke.I will start.A cowboy walks in to a video poker bar and says I want a drink what do you have?Bartender says 24689. Cowboy yells "draw!"
Say a funny joke
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babybubba
- Senior Member
- Posts: 291
- Joined: Fri Apr 20, 2007 9:18 pm
....and Shadowman counters: "24689 can't be right because no one ran it by me yet"!
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chuck arl
- Senior Member
- Posts: 107
- Joined: Mon Dec 18, 2006 2:39 am
I hope his hold buttons were verrry sticky !!!---cwa---
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Eduardo
- Video Poker Master
- Posts: 2963
- Joined: Thu Aug 31, 2006 7:19 pm
I do not even know what that means.
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Eduardo
- Video Poker Master
- Posts: 2963
- Joined: Thu Aug 31, 2006 7:19 pm
More jokes?
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MikeA
- Video Poker Master
- Posts: 1615
- Joined: Tue Oct 24, 2006 3:50 pm
Dolly Parton
and Queen Elizabeth
die on the same day and they both go before an Angel to find out if they'll be admitted to Heaven.
Unfortunately, there's only one space left that day, so the Angel must decide which of them gets in. The Angel asks Dolly if there's some particular reason why she should go to Heaven.
Dolly takes off her top and says,
"Look at these, they're the most perfect breasts God ever created, and I'm sure
it will please the angels to be able to see them every day, for eternity."
The Angel thanks Dolly, and asks Her Majesty the same question.
The Queen takes a bottle of Perrier
out of her purse,
shakes it up, and gargles. Then, she spits into a toilet and pulls the lever.
The Angel says, "OK, your Majesty,
you may go in."
Dolly is outraged and asks, "What was that all about? I show you two of God's own perfect creations and you turn me down. She spits into a commode and she gets in! Would you explain that to me?"
"Sorry, Dolly," says the Angel,
"but even in Heaven,
a royal flush
beats a pair - no matter how big they are!"
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Eduardo
- Video Poker Master
- Posts: 2963
- Joined: Thu Aug 31, 2006 7:19 pm
Very good MikeA! Who else? Does not have to be about poker either.
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Webman
- Video Poker Master
- Posts: 5158
- Joined: Thu Dec 28, 2017 3:11 pm
A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender notices he has a peg leg, a hook for a hand, and an eye patch.
"How'd you lose your leg," asked the bartender.
"Arrrr.... I was swept overboard in a great storm and just as they pulled me aboard, a great shark came up and tore me leg right off!"
"How horrifying!" Replied the bartender. "Mind if I ask about your hook?"
"Arrrr... we boarded a ship and one of the fellers sliced my hand right off just as I was sticking his captain in the chest. I won that one, that day."
"And your eye... what happened there?"
"Arrrr... A seagull dropping hit me right in me face!"
"You lost your eye to a seagull dropping?"
"Well, it was me first day with the hook."
"How'd you lose your leg," asked the bartender.
"Arrrr.... I was swept overboard in a great storm and just as they pulled me aboard, a great shark came up and tore me leg right off!"
"How horrifying!" Replied the bartender. "Mind if I ask about your hook?"
"Arrrr... we boarded a ship and one of the fellers sliced my hand right off just as I was sticking his captain in the chest. I won that one, that day."
"And your eye... what happened there?"
"Arrrr... A seagull dropping hit me right in me face!"
"You lost your eye to a seagull dropping?"
"Well, it was me first day with the hook."
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faygo
- Video Poker Master
- Posts: 2925
- Joined: Tue Jan 09, 2007 6:55 am
My Private Part Died
An old man, Mr Goldstein, was living the last days of his life in a nursing home.
One day he appeard to be very sad and depressed.
Nurse Tracy asked him if anything was wrong.
"Yes, Nurse Tracy," said Mr. Goldstein," My Private Part died today, and I am very sad.
Knowing her patients were sometimes forgetful and sometimes a little crazy she replied,"Oh, Im so sorry , Mr Goldstein, please accept my condolences."
The following day, Mr Goldstein was walking down the hall with his Private Part hanging out of his pajamas, when he met Nurse Tracy.
"Mr. Goldstein," she said you shouldn't be walking down the hall like that. "Please put your Private Part back inside your pajamas."
But, Nurse Tracy,"replied Mr. Goldstein,"I told you yesterday that My Private Part died.
"Yes, you did tell me that, but why is it hanging out of your pajamas?
Well, he replied, "Today's the viewing.
An old man, Mr Goldstein, was living the last days of his life in a nursing home.
One day he appeard to be very sad and depressed.
Nurse Tracy asked him if anything was wrong.
"Yes, Nurse Tracy," said Mr. Goldstein," My Private Part died today, and I am very sad.
Knowing her patients were sometimes forgetful and sometimes a little crazy she replied,"Oh, Im so sorry , Mr Goldstein, please accept my condolences."
The following day, Mr Goldstein was walking down the hall with his Private Part hanging out of his pajamas, when he met Nurse Tracy.
"Mr. Goldstein," she said you shouldn't be walking down the hall like that. "Please put your Private Part back inside your pajamas."
But, Nurse Tracy,"replied Mr. Goldstein,"I told you yesterday that My Private Part died.
"Yes, you did tell me that, but why is it hanging out of your pajamas?
Well, he replied, "Today's the viewing.
