Standard Deflection (or Reflection) Techniques.

[Frank Kneeland]

Thank you Frank for again being the voice of reason and respect that cannot be shaken! When you stay away its like GWAE is without you.How about I challenge you to a wheelchair race? That may be the only thing Im better at than you. Reason??? Well I think I was more the voice of extreme silliness in this thread. Now I do have some possibly important advice for you. Ignore for a moment whether or not anything that was be said to you or about you is true or false, right or wrong. This helps to relieve the natural tendency we have as humans to be defensive. Also, know that most situations like this one grow out of our human nature to judge ourselves by our motives and others only by their actions.Then listen to what people are saying to you, and instead of trying to prove them wrong, or contradict them, try to figure out what you have done or said to illicit such thoughts and feelings, and work on expressing yourself differently in the future to avoid it.One can waste a lot of time in life trying to change other people, when a simple quick modification in our own behavior would have been far easier and more effective. The reason people don't oft take the easier path of self alteration is because they get caught up in their own pride and thoughts of right and wrong.At the end of the day, the only person we can change for sure is ourselves.~FK

[backsider]

[QUOTE=backsider]

Thank you Frank for again being the voice of reason and respect that cannot be shaken! When you stay away its like GWAE is without you.How about I challenge you to a wheelchair race? That may be the only thing Im better at than you. Reason??? Well I think I was more the voice of extreme silliness in this thread. Now I do have some possibly important advice for you. Ignore for a moment whether or not anything that was be said to you or about you is true or false, right or wrong. This helps to relieve the natural tendency we have as humans to be defensive. Also, know that most situations like this one grow out of our human nature to judge ourselves by our motives and others only by their actions.Then listen to what people are saying to you, and instead of trying to prove them wrong, or contradict them, try to figure out what you have done or said to illicit such thoughts and feelings, and work on expressing yourself differently in the future to avoid it.One can waste a lot of time in life trying to change other people, when a simple quick modification in our own behavior would have been far easier and more effective. The reason people don't oft take the easier path of self alteration is because they get caught up in their own pride and thoughts of right and wrong.At the end of the day, the only person we can change for sure is ourselves.~FK[/QUOTE]
 I certainly have learned something from that, thanks, and look forward to the future with renewed vigor and hope. The others?  

[New2vp]

One can waste a lot of time in life trying to change other people, when a simple quick modification in our own behavior would have been far easier and more effective... At the end of the day, the only person we can change for sure is ourselves.Excellent advice to those who have never seen it.  And a good reminder to those who have not.  I have given it myself many times to friends since an outside consultant revealed it to me in a management class where I used to work.I presume this is not the first time you have given it out.  And since your writing shows you to be in the 99th percentile of introspectivity, you likely have counseled some who do not rate as high?This makes me smile a bit because of the inherent irony in this guidance.  So far, everyone to whom I have suggested this course of action has been appreciative and not realized that by giving this advice, I was in fact attempting to do exactly the same thing that I was counseling them NOT to do.  Trying to help them in future endeavors and make them feel better, to be sure, but also trying to change their behavior.  Trying to change the behavior of others.You can guess that when, as a 20-something junior supervisor, I brought this up to the outside management consultant, my discovery was NOT greeted with a positive reception for identifying a profound incongruity.  Instead it received a frown as she turned to the rest of the class and slowly responded, "Ok...Any other questions before we move on?"Nevertheless excellent advice.  I've noticed that some of my advisees took to it better than others.  Your experience?Have a great day and keep on trying to help others!  Honest, I'm not trying to influence your behavior by saying that!Edit:  Frank, an outstanding satirical response from you to me might indeed be "Ok...Any other questions before we move on?", but at least in that case, I would you know that you understood.  The management consultant...not so much.

[Frank Kneeland]

I presume this is not the first time you have given it out.  And since your writing shows you to be in the 99th percentile of introspectivity, you likely have counseled some who do not rate as high? No, I believe it was the first time I've said that. It's been said to me more than once. Before my bout with cancer, I was a different man.

[New2vp]

Well, it's great advice.  Here's to hoping you live many years in good health and can spread that and additional wise counsel to others in the future.Gotta go now and try to change something to make me a better person.  I could do worse than incorporating a few of your standards.

[Eduardo]

You could start by putting on fresh undies.

[edog743]

Eduardo, you are a funny guy I am suprised you did not mention a breath mint too.

[EDC1977]

  Where is the Oprah of oil? He'd know right away. Interesting exchange btw.  @WM and Edog, I frequently use the word "*****" when referring to the NA casinos here in Ca. Understand that I never use it in a derogatory sense. Shadow, you're quite modest for being such a figure of  adulation. I'll not comment about Argentino. I'll let Faygo break out the horse emo first. @Eduardo, next time try the relleno plate. I get a 20% discount if you're interested.

[New2vp]

You could start by putting on fresh undies. Eduardo, I thought I better come back on and say I was not offended in case Webman thinks this is a come back directed at another member. I wouldn't want him to have to suspend you again. Okay , now I better get back to more changing.

[backsider]

  Where is the Oprah of oil? He'd know right away. Interesting exchange btw.  @WM and Edog, I frequently use the word "*****" when referring to the NA casinos here in Ca. Understand that I never use it in a derogatory sense. Shadow, you're quite modest for being such a figure of  adulation. I'll not comment about Argentino. I'll let Faygo break out the horse emo first. @Eduardo, next time try the relleno plate. I get a 20% discount if you're interested.
 By golly, if that isnt the most confusing post. At least it was short and didnt try to explain half a dozen things three ways from Thursday.